He’s Baaack:   We thought Jerry Maybefield would walk into the sunset and (hopefully) be forgotten.   But no, his life seems to have more chapters to be written.   (a) His wife [...]]]>

He’s Baaack:   We thought Jerry Maybefield would walk into the sunset and (hopefully) be forgotten.   But no, his life seems to have more chapters to be written.   (a) His wife filed bankruptcy; obviously well thought out and very timely so as to keep the clock ticking.   (b) He now owes the postal worker $1M in damages due to his dogs savagely biting her.  As far as I’m concerned, since she is a federal employee, Jerry coulda gotten far worse (like being sent up the river).   But even though she went through (and is still going through) hell as a result of the mauling, she’ll probably never see a nickel.   Bummer.    How can he look at himself in the mirror?

Smoke, etc.:   His sarcastic rant after Talladega still lives on.  Most of the drivers are now openly applauding Smoke for his comments, and think something has to be done to decrease the possibility of bad wrecks.   Not necessarily due to this, NA$CAR recently changed a rule relating to the height of the side skirts above ground level in the hope to allow less down force and greater passing ability.   This kind of tweaking isn’t over by a long shot.

Danica:  She just signed with Coke, which makes this her first major sponsor.  But if you thought she was under the microscope before, then wait and see how much more pressure the Coke sponsorship will garner.  It’s like a new golf pro signing with Titleist….and never making the cut.  In order to get the monkey off her back, she’s gonna have to at least run in the tip 5 a lot of the time (and learn how to bump draft).

Mattyboy:   All this hype about him getting a new number may just be that……hype.   They’re trying to spotlight the new (part time) sponsor, and slipped something in about a new ‘number’.   Well, Mattyboy isn’t buying it, so why should we?

All Star Race:   I’m still gonna miss next weekend’s race, and no one has offered to sub for me.  I’m gonna DVR it, so may just send out a (very) late issue if it is worthy of comment.   If anyone wants to offer to do it, speak up.  You don’t have to follow any format, you get to vent on any issue/driver/team, and you don’t have to sign your name (ah, the glory of the internet).

Mikie:   Mikie on the mike.  For some reason, his hairdo is looking weird.  He had his bangs coming waaay down, and with the natural twang he has, he almost looked like a buffoon.  Then later in the program he again over-acted in some laborious ramblings, and I actually wrote down “SHUT UP” in my notes.  He’s one of those like/hate kind of guys.

Da Race:   The first 45% of the race was outright boring.  172 laps of green flag racing where everyone was playing ‘nicey’ is almost too much to swallow.   If nothing else, NA$CAR oughta enact a new rule whereby under (way too long) green flag runs, there oughta be a ‘competition yellow’ thrown after 100 miles (or so many laps, depending on the track).   When it goes that long (45% of the race) and there are only 17 cars on the lead lap, even the most rabid fan gets a tad bored.

Radio:   I listen to the radio on most restarts and during TV commercials, cuz it unfolds in a whole new manner.  Because of the layout at Darlington, the radio led the TV commentary by two laps.  So listening to the radio will alert you in advance of any wrecks, or who actually is leading the restart.

Second Half:   Let’s say we all agree that the first half of the race was boring.  Well, the second half lived up to the advance billing, cuz it turned out to be another rock ‘em/sock ‘em race.  The second half had 7 yellows waving at the appropriate times, and had most of us on the edge of our seats.

Gordo:   The year of 2012 will go down as Gordo’s ‘Hall of Shame’.   Admittedly, most of his problems were not of his making (including 3 blown LR tires in 28 laps), but in total he probably needs a new paint job, a new hairdo, a new mustache…..something that will get him out of the jinxed mode he’s in right now.   If it were me, I’d start by releasing one of his sponsors.  I can’t believe he’s uber left like AARP is, so this is a jinx if I’ve ever seen one.  Come on, Gordo.   Get a backbone.  You wouldn’t endorse the manufacturer of pink slime, would you???   Just my humble opinion…..

Das Kurt:  I admit it.  I turned the TV off too early.   And I was about to offer kudos to das Kurt for his driving skills….and then I decided to read some race news.   I’m a little dumbfounded about Kurt’s catastrophic meltdown after his accident with 7 laps remaining (that also collected Newman).   I missed it when he blew his top (again, as he has in the past).   He apparently missed a few of his anger management sessions, cuz he did a number of dastardly things (read about them) that probably will be unfolding next Wednesday (the typical day for NA$CAR to drop the shoe).  So much talent….continuing to go down the tubes.

Danica ll:   Just a wild thought.   If Danica is in the Coke 600 in Charlotte, how many laps down will she be at the end?   Based upon her Darlington results, I’d guess it’ll be past 5.   I’d love to follow the Vegas odds on that one……

Kudos:  To JJ for finally giving the Rickster his 200th W.   To Denny and Smoke for some late race thrills.  To Marcos for digging himself out of a huge hole.

Heaps of 3’s all over yer local Lowes store,

Racing Maniac  #3

Heaps, RM

Finally: Roush finally came up with a (measly) 4 race sponsor for the Wood Bros 21 car, allowing it to extend its 2012 racing from 12 to 16 races. Wow. You really know [...]]]>

A great race, and one that didn’t consume the entire afternoon.
How could you ask for anything better than this?

Heaps,
RM

Finally: Roush finally came up with a (measly) 4 race sponsor for the Wood Bros 21 car, allowing it to extend its 2012 racing from 12 to 16 races. Wow. You really know how to sweep sponsors off their feet, Roush. But ending this on a high note, it’s good to see that one of the 4 races will be at the All Star race in Charlotte. Go get ‘em, Trevor.

Jerry: Well, we (I) won’t have Jerry Maybefield to kick around much longer. The bank bought back his property and he’s moving out to ‘downsize’. He’s also dropping the law suit against NA$CAR. It’s almost like he finally sobered up to allow him to face the music. Several years ago I suggested he ought to chuck everything and open up a Subway shop, but nooo, he didn’t listen. Goodbye, Jerry. And good riddance. Try real hard not to appear in any more headlines.

Busch League: The race on Saturday was interesting from several standpoints. Not much tandem racing, some wrecks, some tasty Danica tidbits, and a great finish. One ugly wreck saw Eric McClure running full bore into the SAFER wall, and it looked like he was in bad shape when they had to cut him out of the mangled car. Luckily, he’s pretty much OK. Great last minute pass around Kyle by Joey Phenom for the W. On the cool down lap, Hornish pinched Danica. She flipped her wig, came back to him and nudged him into the wall. It’s still gonna be a while until she’s a full member of this male-dominated sport. Good to see the black #3 running on the track again.

Da Race: Maybe one of the warmest spring races at ‘Dega, and it placed added emphasis on the rules changes to help eliminate tandem racing. On top of the worry about the near 200 mph speeds, drivers were worried about water temps and oil temps.

Da Jinx: The “200” Hendrick hats are still in the back of some truck. The odds were going south when JJ’s engine lost an oil pump about a third of the way through the race. Then Gordo’s string of bad luck kicked in again when he got caught up in the Big One with 45 laps to go. At the end of the race you could see both JJ and Gordo hangin’ around, just in case there was gonna be a “200” celebration, but to no avail. Both of these guys are having such bad luck in 2012 that just maybe they’re the source of The Jinx….

Ricky Bobby lives: In spite of his 20th place finish (which belies his effort and accomplishments), das Kurt mostly ran up front and had fun today. He ran a replica of the Ricky Bobby machine, adding in-car banter along the way. Now there’s talk of him being offered a ride in 2013 that might put him back in a Dodge. He’s not back in the Big Leagues yet, but he seems to be inching his way in that direction. If he could just keep his trap shut and remember what he learned in the anger management classes……

Big Ones: We had one with 45 to go when Almirola hooked Blaney, causing a 9 car fandango. Then on a restart with 4 laps to go, AJ tried to block Denny, and 12 cars got various degrees of shredding. Both seemed to be driver errors.

Kudos: To Bradski, who ran a smart race, and capitalized on it when it counted. To Kyle, who quietly was there at the end. To Mattyboy, who had a ‘coulda, woulda, shoulda’ afternoon. To Davie Ragan and Trevor Bayne, who drove their underfunded cars into a top 10 finish.

Heaps of threes all over yer next can of Miller Lite,

Racing Maniac #3

It Figures:   Roush came up with a 15 race sponsorship for Stenhouse in the Busch League, but can he get a sponsor for the more deserving Trevor Bayne on the Cup side?   Gee, I don’t think so.  I realize Trevor has [...]]]>

It Figures:   Roush came up with a 15 race sponsorship for Stenhouse in the Busch League, but can he get a sponsor for the more deserving Trevor Bayne on the Cup side?   Gee, I don’t think so.  I realize Trevor has a lot of loyalty going on, but maybe he just oughta think about jumping ship to a quality ride next year.  He deserves better than a start-n-park ride (the 21 car is doing more parking than starting this year).

Bow to the Prince:   JJ was again selected as Forbes most influential athlete.   Come on now…..he’s more influential than Gordo, Smoke, and even Jburton?   Someone at Forbes must be smoking some funny-weed.   But then, Forbes is not what we’d call a ‘sports’ organization, so what do they know?

A Princely Suggestion:   Upon getting the dubious ‘most influential’ nod, JJ quickly suggested that a good way to fix the ‘NA$CAR problem’ is to do away with some of the 1.5 mile cookie cutters.   Yeah, JJ, and you think the France and Bruton organizations are gonna chop up some of their spiffy speedways because of a hair-brained suggestion like that?   Mr. Influential just did an ‘open mouth, insert foot’…….

Bros?:   The next time you watch a race, take a good long gander at the Waltrip boys.   Are we sure they have the same parents?   They sure don’t look that way.   And for that reason, neither do Kurt and Kyle Busch.  Apparently, strange things can happen in 9 months…….

SirMark:   This dude is looking older and older every time we see him.   He’s in fantastic shape (for an old goat), but he’s packin’ enough wrinkles to make a Hollywood star commit suicide.   Someone hand him a cane….and the phone number of the nearest plastic surgeon.

Bowowyer:   He does a great ad for 5 Hour.   He’s boppin’ along, and finally gets into the picture with Mikie and friends.   Which brings up a question.   I have a need-to-know:   In that scene, is that Mikie’s wife, or the wife of the other dude to the left of Mikie?  Someone….please enlighten me.   But I may not want to know the answer……

All Star Race:   Although I’m gonna tape the race, I’m gonna be out of town that weekend and won’t be able to cover the race.   I need a sub for that weekend, and for the first time I’m opening it up to race fans all over North America.   If you think it would be fun to vent your emotions (without taking someone’s complete leg off), give me a holler.  We’re talking about the May 19th race in Charlotte.   Lemme know.   I’ll try to make sure you make the Net.

Da Race:   For a long while, I thought it was gonna be another boring race with few Yellows.   But it eventually became an exciting Richmond race with plenty of action for everyone.   Yeah, Gordo had another arrow in his target of bad luck, but can anyone ‘splain something to me?   How can Gordo finish in 23rd place, yet gain one spot in the Points?  How’d he do dat, Howdy Doody?

Da Flipster:   He was like a stallion most of the night, then faded at the end.   It’s gotta be a tough cookie to swallow, but that’s why these guys are getting paid the big bucks.   His night came undone when he ‘allegedly’ jumped the gun on a restart, and got black flagged for his efforts.   One might want to cast some aspersion on Smoke, cuz it sure looked like he either spun his wheels, or intentionally lifted off the gas when he saw Flip beat him to the punch.  Either way, Flip sure looked like he deserved the penalty.

Jr:   How can a guy with a long dry spell be second in the Points, and closing fast on becoming first?   Consistency.   You can look at the guy on top of the war wagon for the defining person that’s making this happen.   In years past, I threw a lot of darts at LeFarte, but it was mainly because it appeared like he was holding Gordo back.   The pairing of LeFarte and Jr. seems to be the exact mixture that could bring success to the 88 car.  Thus far this year, they look a tad better than the “I’ve got Five” team.

Heaps of 3’s all over yer bag of M&M’s,

Racing Maniac  #3

The King:   What a waffle-head.   He’s a staunch supporter of [...]]]>

The King:   What a waffle-head.   He’s a staunch supporter of Dodge for most of his career, then suddenly switches to Ford (in hopes of being as competitive as Roush).   Then all of a sudden, when Dodge sees Penske exit the fold, the King starts thinking about rejoining Dodge.   What a weird move.   If this happens, Petty would be getting engines from Penske, who themselves will be running Ford power plants.   Doesn’t seem like a good vision of a success story…..   And by the way, to make things screwier, Dodge is now offering a special “Dodge by Petty”.

Jr:   Open mouth, insert foot.   Why on earth would Jr. tell the press that he’s the best driver at Hendrick?   Why?  Because he may be about 15 tablespoons short of a cup of bean soup (yeah, the kind of soup that makes you flatuate….and this time out of one’s mouth).

Penske:   Why was Penske the only team having problems figuring out the fuel pick-up component in the new fuel injection system?   You’d think that after all this time, they’d have determined where their problem is, and woulda fixed it.   Something’s breaking, and needs to be replaced before they can get the car going again.  How different could it be from the Ford or Chevy?  Bradski is getting irritated, and well he should.

Maybe(not):   Jerry Maybefield’s legal problems have spread to a third county in N.C.   The Mooresville police department charged him with five counts of felony breaking and entering of tractor trailers and one count of subsequent felony larceny from alleged crimes that occurred in the latter part of 2010.  He’s also charged with two counts of felony breaking and entering and felony larceny from a building.   In Catawba County, he faces three charges of possession of stolen goods, one count of obtaining property by false pretenses and one count of possession of methamphetamine.   In Caldwell County, he faces four counts of felony larceny.   If they locked him up for 10 years in each county, it would put him out of our hair for the next 30 years.   Hey, since they’re gonna auction off his house on April 30th, he’s gonna need a roof over his head…….

Patti:   There’s something going on that we aren’t aware of.  Patti Petty has been a driving force to get the Kansas City Victory Junction up and running.   All of a sudden, they’re telling her to back off, and not be a working part of the organization anymore.  She’s persona non grata.  The board of directors reportedly told her she was making irrational decisions, and to bug off.   There’s gotta be more to this story, so we’ll let it play out…..

Da Race:   NA$CAR allowed a gear change before the race, and the combination of cool weather and higher revs caused a number of engines to ‘expire’.   Two of the MWR engines (#15 early, and #55 late), and two of the Hendrick engines (the #24 and #51 late, and about a lap apart).   The Ford engines made it through the race without a burp.

Truaxle:   It looked like Marty might pull off an astounding win, cuz he lead most of the laps by far.  But when the sun came out after the last pit stop, he lost some performance, and Denny Hambone was finally able to get around him.   With about 3 to go, Marty made one more valiant effort but just couldn’t make the pass.  Another ‘coulda, woulda, shoulda’.

The 200th:    The hats are still in the back of the truck.   Maybe the night race at Richmond next weekend will be Hendricks 200th win………but then again, maybe not.   The longer it stretches out, the harder it’s gonna be.   It’s a good thing the hats have adjustable headbands, cuz some of the guys may be bald by then.   But eventually it’s gotta happen.

Questions:   Why aren’t Kyle and da Flipster a factor in races this year?   Why is Gordo off to his worst start in years?  Why hasn’t Trevor Bayne gotten another sponsor by now?

Heaps of 3’s all over yer local FedEx Ground driver,

Racing Maniac  #3

Bayne:   Last minute changes allowed Trevor to run at Texas, but lack of sponsorship is a black cloud over their head.   Wood Bros. is using Roush for their support, but if you ask me, they should get a new promoter.   Roush certainly isn’t doing any favors for Wood Bros, and [...]]]>

How do you spell  B O R I N G  ?

Bayne:   Last minute changes allowed Trevor to run at Texas, but lack of sponsorship is a black cloud over their head.   Wood Bros. is using Roush for their support, but if you ask me, they should get a new promoter.   Roush certainly isn’t doing any favors for Wood Bros, and as you would expect, they get sponsors for their main drivers (plus talk of bringing the #6 car out of mothballs), and Bayne appears to be an afterthought.   Wood Bros, it’s time to get a new mule, and reward Trevor with a stable ride.

JJ:   Still don’t like the all black car.   Looks goofy, and it’s hard to pick out on the track.   But maybe they want to run under the radar this year…..

Jburton:   The question is:   should he retire and give the seat to a more promising driver?    For the last several years, he’s not been a factor and is running mid-pack most of the time.   But then, we could almost say the same thing about Casey Mears, Reed Sorenson, Joey Phenom Logano and a whole bunch of other mediocre drivers.

Motormouth:   Hearing Mikie in the booth is by and large an insult to our ears.   If he could just tone down a bit, perhaps he’d be more tolerable. But Yikes…. It’s like we’re listening to Mikie on steroids……or some other mind bending chemical.

JGR:    Not much of the ‘dominance’ factor with this team in 2012.    Denny has shown a couple flashes of brilliance, but Kyle seems to be dragging an anchor around.   And Joey looks like he WANTS to lose his ride.

Da Race:   Two Yellows, followed by many, many, (far too) many Green flag laps.   Two-thirds of the race was run under Green.   How boring can you make a race?   Sure, we’re excited to see da Biff and JJ trying to duke it out for a W, but this was surrounded by lap after lap of boring racing.   Maybe we should change the name of this track to Bristol West.   Where was NA$CAR when we really needed them (with their ‘mysterious’ Yellow flag for debris)?   But nooo, they’d rather we fall asleep.   Come on, Bruton……..get mad at this track, too.

SirMark:   He’s great in the Aaron’s commercials, but he’s also a great driver.   The sneaky little runt was in the lead pack most of the night.   One would think that Mikie would take him aside and try to talk him into a full time ride in the #55 for the rest of 2012.

The hats:   The “Hendrick 200th Win” hats are still in the back of someone’s truck.   It won’t be long before the dust mites start chewing them to threads.  If someone would accidentally leave them in Charlotte, perhaps one of the boys would come home with a checkered flag.   Yeah, that’s it…..they seem to be jinxed by the hats…..

Heaps of 3’s all over yer 3M gismo (whatever it is),

Racing Maniac   #3

And if you’re dead in the water, hoping to get a push, don’t hold your breath….

Heaps, RM

Jr the Chef: “Earnhardt Jr. has cooked for his girlfriend, his mom and even prepared a steak dinner for team owner Rick Hendrick when Hendrick was courting him [...]]]>

A good race. A very good race (at the end).

And if you’re dead in the water, hoping to get a push, don’t hold your breath….

Heaps,
RM

Jr the Chef: “Earnhardt Jr. has cooked for his girlfriend, his mom and even prepared a steak dinner for team owner Rick Hendrick when Hendrick was courting him in 2007 to drive for Hendrick Motorsports.” OK, he admitted he has a girlfriend, so why doesn’t she show up at the track? She’s like the mystery girl. Hey, are we sure that Jr. was born in the United States?

Jerry: A three-judge U.S. Court of Appeals panel rejected Maybefield’s appeal in his lawsuit against NASCAR regarding a May 2009 drug test that NASCAR said was positive for meth. Is this the end of that bad boy? Nooo, he has another out, in that he could ask for a hearing before all the judges of the U.S. Court of Appeals Fourth Circuit, and the next step would be an appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court. Will he go that far? Well this (alleged) village idiot has gone this far, hasn’t he? What makes us believe he’s gonna throw in the towel at this point?

Hermie: OK, he’s gonna start racing again, this time for a ‘start-up’ team via a sale from RCR. Yeah, he’s a likable kind of guy, but he never had a distinguishing racing career. His best gig is behind the microphone. It still amazes me how teams pick drivers, and vice versa. But I guess I’m only ‘amazed’ with the C and D drivers, cuz the A drivers (the really good ones) are destined to have good rides (and they seem to fit like a glove). The B drivers seem to hang in there for awhile…..until someone finally realizes that they are in actuality C drivers. How’s that for some racing mumbo jumbo? (PS: he finished 31st…..good for a D+)

Bruton: The verdict is in, but we won’t know for a couple more weeks what he’s gonna do to Bristol to make it more exciting. But trust me…..if he doesn’t get it right the first time, he’ll keep trying until he again gets thrilling racing on this ½ mile track. And the fans final ‘vote’ will be seeing how many of them will be in the stands in future races. Yeah, the Fall race might be sold out, but the question will be answered next Spring.

Da Race: It didn’t look that way even half way into the race, but it turned out to be Exciting, with a capital E.

Das Kurt: We wonder if das Kurt is still having fun with his new ride. Early in the race, he twice blew out his RF tire bead, probably due to over use of the brakes. In other words, he had a bad setup, and abused his brakes/RF tire. How long is it gonna be until he wigs out and blows his over-abused fuse ?? I’d be checking him for chemicals if he had a few more races like this one…….

Bro Kyle: A broken rear track bar, a wall job, a long time in the garage, and an end to any vision of a good finish. Well, at least he won’t be smashing the grandfather clock (like he did with the guitar in Nashville).

Kase of Kahne: Hey, bub. Do we need to say anything more about the jinxed #5 on the side of yer car? Do yourself a favor and ask the Rickmeister to change it to 25……or 105…..anything but 5.

The Lotto: Something tells me that 99% of the fans watching this race in the waning laps woulda bet the farm on Hendrick getting his 200th win. What with his cars running 1/2/3 with only about 10 laps to go, it woulda been a sure thing. But nooo, the fickle finger of fate flicked a booger in his direction. The ultimate letdown (what with him having already printed up his “200” self awards). Well, they’ve gotta stay in the trunk for another race or two (or three or four).

The last Yellow: It came out with 4 laps to go, and although they were in the lead, the only cars NOT coming into the pits were Gordo and JJ. Yeah, these bad boys were gonna stay out, race for the lead….and the win. Not so fast, comrades. Another booger was about to be flung.

GWC: What with worn tires, it was no wonder that Gordo and JJ were gonna have a slow re-start. So, Bowowyer dove down below both of ‘em, and eventually caused The Big One, sending JJ into the wall, and severely hampering Gordo’s ability to drive in a straight line (or even around a corner). And off in the dust went FlyinRyan and Jr (albeit somewhat dinged by squeezing through The Big One).

The End: I don’t know about the rest of you, but I think I’m pretty happy with the way it turned out. FlyinRyan finally came up with a good race (he needed it), and Jr somehow managed to come in 2nd. Yeah, the Rickster will eventually get his 200th W, but in the meantime, give us some more (many more) exciting finishes like this one.

Heaps of 3’s all over yer local Outback (I’m beginning to drool),
Racing Maniac #3