* Hundreds of volunteers have started to stack sandbags around you.
* Doctor tells you your weight would be perfect for a man 17 feet tall.
*. You are responsible for a slight but measurable shift in the earth’s axis.
* You spill more food on you than the local soup kitchen dispenses
* Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy
* The “Gravy Boat” your wife set out was a real 12′ jon boat!
* The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland
* Your “Big Elvis Super-Belt” won’t even go around your waist
* You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail
* You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday
* Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy
* You have 5 TV sets side-by-side to catch all the football games/motorsports.
* That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn
* Your wife wears a life jacket at night in your water bed
* Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice
* You consider gluttony as your patriotic duty
* It looks like the left-overs are gonna last until Christmas
* Your arms are too short to reach the keyboard & delete this
* A guest quotes a Biblical passage from “The Feeding of the 5000″
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